Confessions of a Virgin

Anyone that knows me knew this entry was coming.

Yes. I, Matthew Pearson, am a virgin.
Yes, I realize I've been in a  relationship for 5 and a half years.
Yes, I also realize I'm 22 years old.

So what is this entry going to be about?

A boasting of holding on to my V-card until marriage?
Nope

a judgement of those who didn't?
Not at ALL

A preachy social commentary on my disappointment in the expectations of society......?
Well, I mean, don't act like you've never read my blog before ;)

While risking offending most of societies progressive movements, what I really want to talk about, is the stigma on remaining abstinent.

How super conservative of me, right?

Here's the deal. There are programs that teach safe sex, and there are programs that teach abstinence. There's really no middle ground, at least in Arkansas. Yes, if we are taught safe-sex, we are also taught that the "safest"-sex is no sex. But, of course, the instructor jokingly says it.

But why does it have to be a joke? It is completely possible to wait. And while I completely understand that no one HAS to wait, I don't understand why we have to "expect" that young people are having sex anyway.

My landlady came over the other day and told me we had to remove the infamous "that's what she said" poster. For those who don't know, it's a giant poster on the wall that is covered in "that's what she said" quotes that get mistakenly said in the house. My landlady began to justify herself by saying "I know you're young, and you're having sex, but I don't want to read about it on the poster." Well my immediate reaction was shock that she thought we were doing the things written on the poster. Hahaha.

Second reaction: Offense. I made sure to correct her. "Actually we're waiting until marriage."

And as most people react whenever I make the proud declaration, she was silenced.

As all journalists know, Never ASSUME, it makes an ASS (out of) U (and) ME.

Here's the deal: Ashley and I are waiting until marriage (two more days!) to have sex. Could we have had sex a LONG time ago? Absolutely. But we didn't, we waited. We learned about each other. We learned to appreciate every aspect of the other. When others were loving and losing, when relationships played musical chairs all around, we remained together. We were best friends. I am not ashamed of it at all. I don't feel any less of a man. We are still very physically attracted to each other. We have passion, we have love, our relationship is much deeper than I think a lot of people have experienced. Much further than physical.

Do I believe in the physical aspect relationships? Sure. But to put it on an elementary level. The penis does not have to enter anything to have a strong physical relationship. I think that concept tends to get lost, yet couples wander aimlessly spending ungodly amounts of money wondering why they've lost the passion. Why she's no longer being satisfied.

We worry about why children are reproducing. I admit it's a problem. But maybe shoving condoms into their pockets isn't the answer.

Maybe preaching abstinence isn't the answer.

Maybe these single parent children just need to be taught to love, not only others, but themselves.

The love of my parents was rivaled by no other. Growing up I didn't looked for a girl that I could use a condom on. I looked for a girl that would love me like my mom loved my dad.

I think I found her.


p.s. in two more days it's my turn :)